My stupid fever relapsed earlier this week, so this week was largely devoted to catching up with my Duolingo. I did some speaking exercises on phrases, but the key to this is the word ‘some’.

One of all the new Russian words I learnt the past week took my breath away. It is Тоска, pronounced as ‘toska’ and on the surface, it means sadness or melancholia. However, it has shades. Let the beautiful words of Vladimir Nabokov explain what I mean:

‘No single word in English renders all the shades of ‘toska’. At its deepest and most painful, it is a sensation of great spiritual anguish, often without any specific cause. At less morbid levels it is a dull ache of the soul, a longing with nothing to long for, a sick pining, a vague restlessness, mental throes, yearning. In particular cases it may be the desire for somebody of something specific, nostalgia, love-sickness. At the lowest level it grades into ennui, boredom.’

For me, sadness just meant sadness and I never thought that it can ever be possible to attach the reason behind it inside the word itself. It is ironic that the word for all shades of sadness is bringing me such joy but it is. Maybe it is the writer inside me trying to read too much between the lines but you know what, not all sadnesses are equal. Okay, I will stop now 😀

I am back home and I hope to post more regularly now. Till then, пока пока 🙂

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